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Click here for more information. What rock is a 6.
A woman walked up to an elderly man rocking in a chair on his porch. This joke may contain profanity. Comedy is pretty much the new rock and roll, In the sense that there are multiple unprosecuted sexual predators. If The Rock ever stars in a movie called Cage I fear this will only grow more confusing. How does a rock pee? He Dwaynes his Johnson.
Growing up my mom was worried I get into sex, drugs, and rock and roll. At least she got the drugs and rock and roll part right. What do you call a rock climbing rabbi? Mountain Jew.
Click here for more information. I heard you lost your classical music CD. I got your Bach. I still howl at the old Monica Lewinsky classic.
She was feeling self conscious because the tabloids were labeling her pudgy. So she asks her plastic surgeon to remove her love handles. When she comes out of anesthesia and looks in the mirror, she notices she doesn't have ears anymore. Classic We didn't have paedophiles when I was a kid, we had to buy our own sweets. This joke may contain profanity. A woman driving along at speed passed over a bridge only to find a cop with a radar gun on the other side lying in wait.
The cop stammered, 'A what? Did you know Lynyrd Skynyrd owns a movie theater that plays a different classic film every day? A classics professor goes to a tailor to get his trousers mended. Rodney Dangerfield's classic one liner: When I was little my dad gave me a bat The first time I played with it, it flew away. A long time ago, I had a job where I translated pre-classical Greek literature into Braille.
It feels like ancient history. The classic cake day joke. Enjoy A woman dies and goes to the gates of heaven. When she gets there, she is perplexed and confused to find everyone furiously cracking eggs, dumping flour, and mixing batter.
She turns around and sees an entire section dedicated to decoration, with elaborate concoctions of strawberries, If classical composers of old were alive and listened to some of the music that's popular today, they'd all complain Except Beethoven.
Timeless Classic: What do you call a cow with two legs? Yo momma. A man with a gun barged into the pub earlier and was threatening violence if the bar didn't play some classic 80s tunes. Luckily The Police turned up and sorted him out. What did Arnold Schwarzenegger say when he found out his school was organizing a show and tell about classical music?
I'll be Bach. I'm like a classic Mercedes Benz I depreciate much more rapidly than what's available nowadays, and I become more expensive to fix with time. What do rap fans and classic rock fans have in common? They both have to worry about their favorite artist dying before the concert.
Sylvester Stallone and Arnold Schwarzenegger are talking to each other about their long careers as action heroes. Sly says, "You did some okay comedy, but you have the governorship and political success to be proud of. I've never been nominated for an Oscar, you have have beenLog in or Sign up.
Oh my gosh! You're cooking too many at once.Impractical Jokers: Top You Laugh You Lose Moments (Mashup) - truTV
Turn them! We need more butter. Hurry up! Have you LOST your mind? Don't forget to salt them. You know you always forget to salt them. Use the Salt. You think I don't know how to fry a couple of eggs? Aug 30, at AM 2. Frands That got me. Frands likes this. Aug 30, at AM 3.Rick Astley will let you borrow any movie from his collection of Pixar films except one.
Worst Christmas present ever: a Bonnie Tyler sat nav.
Keeps telling me to turn around, and every now and then it falls apart. A: He had a scart issue via HackneyTim. Q: Did you hear Sophie Ellis Bextor died at the home of a footballer? Stevie Wonder and Ray Charles playing tennis. Q: Why did George Michael have chocolate all over his balls? A: He was careless with his Wispa. Q: Why did KT Tunstall fall over unexpectedly?
A: It was suddenly icy via garydunion. What do The Smiths have for breakfast? My girlfriend said she was leaving me because of my obsession with the Monkees. I thought she was joking. But then I saw her face via LouiseKPhillips. Two Beach Boys walk into a bar. Q: What do you call a gingerbread man with one leg bitten off? A: Limp Bizkit. A : Because the streets have no names. U2 are playing Live Aid. Q: How do you turn a duck into a soul singer? They had career differences. How many indie hipsters does it take to change a lighbulb?
Q: What do hip-hop muscians put on their cuts and grazes? A: Ghetto plasters via BMWavesblog. A: Ferguson is playing Giggs this year via jonmcclure.
What do you get when you mix stadium rock with indie rock? Freddie Mercury Rev. Q: How many Pet Shop Boys does it take to change a lightbulb?Is it okay to tell funny jokes about the Rolling Stones?
classic rock jokes
In fact, it's a gas. What do you call a group of alligators that get together to sing parody songs? Why are rock band's members all such perverts? Because the drummer sits in back beating it, the guitarist is fingering minors, the bassist is slapping it around and they all like the pianist.
Roadie Pick-Up Line : Hey girl, are you a mike that's been left on too long? The fact that there's a Highway to Hell and a Stairway to Heaven says alot about the anticipated traffic. Which musical instrument does Darth Vader play in the band?
The Rebel Bass. What kind of music do pirates listen to aboard a dingy? Rock n Row. What did Han Solo change his name to after marrying Princess Leia?
Han Duet. Who is Han Solo's favorite rap artist?
The Best Drummer Jokes To Give You A Big Laugh
Why did the rock star alien retire? The music and drugs got him all spaced out in the s! Which rock band has members with obsessive-compulsive disorder?
What do programmers call a sythesizer guitar that's out of tune? A synth-axe error. What did the fan who loved the Rolling Stones do? She made a Mick's tape. How do you rate Smashing Pumpkins in your top 90s bands? How many rockin' drummers does it take to change a light bulb?Thanks to all of you, Stupid Pictures of Def Leppard officially broke followers!! How many of our followers do we love, Joe?
Roger: Participate-in-the-what? Found on Lady Madonna - The Beatles. Rolling Stones pun anyone?